To tackle insults

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    • #47823
      Yash RS

      What we should do if one tries to insult us around others?

       Should we just ignore or should we respond?

      #1 Because if we ignore, others consider us that we lack self respect and will treat us in the same way claiming that we are afraid and so on.

      #2 If we respond, it may alleviate the situation because only we understand the Dhamma and not the opposite party.

      So what should be done? I personally feel to ignore all that but again the problem #1 emerges.

      What should be done?

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    • #47825

      1. Those steps describe the prevalent mindset. That is how most people think.

      • However, there is a better approach described by the Buddha.

      2. In Buddha’s perspective, the goal is to “cool the mind” (preventing it from getting “heated” via lobha, dosa, and moha.)

      • The approach is not only to ignore insults but also to have genuine “mettā” for that person. 
      • Think about this: 99.9999% of people today do not understand how suffering arises. The only way they know of responding to insults is to “pay back the same way.” 
      • But we know such responses will only take our minds away from Nibbāna and toward more suffering.
      • Many concepts that need to be contemplated are embedded in the third chart from the current post, “Purāna and Nava Kamma – Sequence of Kamma Generation.” (I could not get the chart to appear here. But you should carefully examine it. a mind tends to move away from Nibbāna (represented by the diamond in the chart.) It takes a real effort to resist “going with the flow,” but the benefits are enormous.)

      3. If one lives that mindset, many of these issues will go away over time. It is not going to happen in a day or two. It may take a few months, at least. 

      • But I have personally verified/experienced it over the past ten years. 
      • “Dhamma will guide and protect one who lives by Dhamma” (”Dhammo ha ve rakkhati Dhammacāri.”)
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