November 24, 2018 at 4:41 pm #20389
You seem to make up confused ideas on the basis what you learned and read here (and before). For your own sake and sanity do not follow this process of the mind because it will leave you depressed and in a very negative state of mind/feeling.
Just follow the instructions in a day and then when your mind will come back to sanity and lightness it will be easier to understand what is explained on this site.
You will not think your way out of sansara without doing proper work with your mind, directly.
There is just something very negative/painful coming out of you when I read you, sorry. :(