Reply To: How to let go of anger and hateful thoughts?


Thank you Lal for your explanation.

I am very glad I possibly “stopped arising of suffering in future rebirths” from that incident.

Sometimes we retaliate angrily out of perceived cultural norms that we should defend our honour or to save ‘face’. For example, in certain societies, there is a culture of honour in which slights to one’s pride should be avenged, if my knowledge of my university psychology textbook materials is still accurate.

Then there are other societies in which it is important to save ‘face’.

These expectations may even be so ingrained in us that we unconsciously see them as our very own personal expectations.

However all these cultural norms and expectations pale in comparison to the Buddha’s wisdom in advising us to restrain immoral thoughts and refrain from carrying out immoral actions of mind, speech and body. It is not cowardly, but indeed very wise, to avoid needless escalation of conflicts that could give rise to future bad kamma vipaka.

Indeed, the Buddha is an extremely knowledgeable and competent psychologist, therapist and emotional ‘doctor’. He is certainly one of the best, if not the best, out there in addressing the root causes of suffering.

Even non-Buddhists, I feel, would do well to learn from His teachings on how to reduce suffering. They may ignore the more supramundane parts of His teachings, if they are not yet ready or are unwilling to accept those aspects of His teachings. But it is an undeniable fact that His teachings would be very helpful to anyone who is distressed about life.

Of course, they may also need to supplement the Buddha’s teachings with other forms of therapy that are specifically adapted to their unique situations and needs.