Hi Austin,
it is good, that you are on the spiritual path. This will make things better for you.
I will speak directly. I do not want to hurt you, insult you or despise your efforts. I appreciate your openness and your courage.
When reading on your website I realised that you see the suffering filled world, but you do not want to escape from this suffering and this world as the Buddha taught. You want to stay here and live like a superhero (Avenger) to pacify the societies and to overcome suffering. The books you mention are esoteric clutter. Somehow you take a piece from here and there and you hope that it will make sense overall.
You mention Daniel Ingram who sees the Theravada as the most antiquated form of Buddhism (“limited emotional range model”). As he says: “And yet, their maps of enlightenment still contain a hefty helping of scary market-driven propaganda and so much garbage that is life-denying, dangerously out of touch with what happens, and an impediment to practice for millions of people.”
or
“They are chained to the texts, myths and the ancient lies, seemingly doomed to indoctrinate and brainwash generation after generation of monks, practitioners and devoted followers with their delicious poison. What a freakish paradox that the meditative techniques and technologies that I consider among the most powerful and direct ever created should come from a tradition whose models of awakening contain some of the worst bullshit of them all. …”
Especially the removal of greed and hate is not understood by Daniel Ingram. He claims to be an Arahant and at the same time he says it is not necessary/not possible to overcome lobha and dosa. He also says some Arahants he knows are full of greed or hate. I don’t know if Daniel Ingram is aware of rebirth and the causes for rebirth.
But Lals website is based on the Tipitaka where it is stated again and again, that one must reduce and finally remove those defilements. The teachings of the Buddha, which we now have recovered by Waharaka Thero and Lal, are self consistent and full of logic. Therefore I suggest to learn the Buddha Dhamma and see if it makes sense to you. If it makes sense you will let go all the rest as there is no use in it anymore.
I know from my experience that for other people it is very hard to look at the suffering or just to dare to overcome it. Normally the people go with the flow, they do not want to escape. Habits are so strong.
With metta,
Tobias