Eric,Lal,
@Lal said “One may not even realize, but dasa akusala are burden to the mind. Most times, one will realize it only when one gets rid of that burden. Then one can look back and realize the “cooling down”.”
I was someone quite inclined (gathi) to harsh verbal conflits ,kind of : “ha you dared to say that, now listen to this…” and the exchange could last for more then a while, well, it’s thanks to a better understanding of Tilakhanna that i succeed(ed) in overcoming such tendency, and even transform it into a source of “cooling down”.
I found myself remaining calm whilst observing the “burning” in my interlocutor’s mind-heart and found myself ending the whole conflict with a simple “whatever”.
krgds