“They think that Nibbana is the extinction of a “person””
From my experience, when talking to people who view Nibbana as “extinction”, I sense an unease in them: there is no one left to “enjoy” Nibbana.
To make matters worse is the translation of “Parinibbana” in my native language. “Parinibbana” is translated as “Enter Nibbana”. Thus the Buddha’s Parinibbana is translated as: “The Buddha entered Nibbana”. This gives the imagery of Nibbana as a “place” of eternal happiness, like an eternal heaven.
If this happens in your native languages, then beware of it. At puredhamma.net, we are fortunate to have Lal explain Dhamma concepts in Pali terms. After the concepts sink in, we can contemplate Dhamma concepts directly with Pali.
For me, a great example of this is Lal’s explanation of Paticca samuppāda (pati + ichcha leading to sama uppada). With that understanding, looking at “Paticca samuppāda”, we can see the meaning staring right at us, without resorting to a rendering to another language such as “dependent origination”, “dependent co-arising”, etc. In my native language, it is rendered “twelve-link conditionals”. (As an aside, “anatta” is also literally “no self” in my language).
One more thing to be wary of: in “sabbe dhammā anatta”, some very well-known teachers include Nibbana in here (dhammā), and that anatta is “no self”; and thus consequently “Nibbana is no self” . I know this for a fact, since I saw this time and time again prior to puredhamma.net, and I’m still seeing it taught this way, as I’m sure you are too.
If we make the effort to learn the Pali words (at least the key ones), we can cut down on a lot of overthinking.
Best,
Lang