Embodied asked: “If you were to define a Sotapanna by describing his/her demeanour and mental state in everyday life how would you describe it ?”
I have changed the title of the topic to state clearly what the topic is about: “Mental State/Demeanor of a Sotapanna”.
It is a good question, but always try to make the title meaningful and descriptive too.
Sotapanna is the first stage of Nibbana, which by definition is “ragakkhaya, dosakkhya, mohakkhaya” or “removal of greed, hate, ignorance from one’s mind”.
– At the first stage of Sotapanna, one would removed the panca nivarana: kamaccanda, vyapda, thinamiddha, uddacca kukkucca, vicikicca. These are what “covers” one’s mid and makes one CAPABLE of doing apayagami actions under extreme conditions.
– When pancanivarana are removed PERMANENTLY, one starts experiencing a change at least over time, lessening of the burden on the mind. Desire to enjoy sense pleasure is likely to continue unless one makes rapid progress. Stopping the rebirth process does not happen until the Arahant stage, but the sense of well-being starts actually at the Sotapanna Anugami stage.
The main thing that happens is a drastic change in one’s world view. Even though one may still enjoy sense pleasures, one has clearly seen the fruitlessness and even dangers in attaching to sense pleasures. One will definitely not do any apayagami actions even spontaneously (and that is the key). So, the first thing is a change of mindset.
Outward appearances is more tricky.
Akvan said: “There were sotapannas who were married and had 5-7 kids, some married to hunters, others who were kings, princes, princesses, millionaires, businessmen and even prostitutes.”
That is correct. One cannot recognize a Sotapanna by his/her outward appearance. However, what Akvan cited above were the exceptions rather than the norm. They of course make a point: One’s outward appearances could be deceiving.
– One would normally become more “settled down” and “more responsible”. That could be sensed by one’s close family/friends. Certainly, the person him/her self would realize the change at least over time.